Discovering the Past

Early this morning I decided to grab a coffee from a Starbucks at the riverside of town.  While deciding where to go from there I wrote some thoughts on a piece of newspaper in green ink that went something like this.

Disappointment A claw catch a tiger by the toe commercial
Rippa, Kelly
Add in bed to the end of
your statement
Rogers, Sy
will never accept your imperfections.
Your other bank
The obese, handicapped, the underweight the outspoken
Running with scissors
Catch me if you can
Got a radical head check!
Belcher Nation

Sometimes hurt has a way of showing itself to us in unexpected ways.  I remember a transitional time in my early adult life.  My chosen job title wasnt as suiting as had been assigned.  I was becoming less and less open to the idea of being able to qualify in the program.  After a decision to give up on the original plans was set before me and the decision was made to start over with a different program, i was given some holiday vacation time and took it.  The vacation time was already planned however, the timing was off.  Once returning from the vacation time, the only option was to plea for my original assignment and continue on.  This left a scar on me from the begining.  I was obviously labeled as a problem.  How difficult working through that stage had proved to be.  Managing to continue, surrounded by snarky undertones of that episode was trying.  The only sense I managed to save from that was my dignity.  These instances seem to reverb with me from season to season like a bad cold.  Like going from one extreme to the other.